Monday, December 11, 2006

Two More Elvis Costellos?

Congratulations are in order for Elvis Costello and his wife, jazz singer Diana Krall. The two are new parents of twin boys. Dexter Henry Lorcan and Frank Harlan James were born on December 6. The babies were born on the couple's third wedding anniversary. (Do you think that Diana Krall and blogger Heather Fink look alike?)

Recently fired Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld (the latest person to be on the receiving end of that famous Bush loyalty) made one last trip to Iraq to "thank" everyone. He did not allow anyone from the media to accompany him. He did let Fox News' Sean Hannity sit on his lap on the plane ride, though. At least somebody besides Mrs. Runsfeld still loves Rummy.

Wanna know what happens when you ignore the real enemy in the war on terror and focus all your energies in the wrong place? You get the massive resurgence of the Taliban and Al Queda throughout Afghanistan and Pakistan. "This year more than 100 local leaders, government sympathizers or accused 'American spies' have been killed, several of them in beheadings, as the militants have used a reign of terror to impose what President Pervez Musharraf of Pakistan calls a creeping 'Talibanization.'" Great. And somehow the incompetent fools in the White House, Pentagon, and the right-wing blogosphere still think they have any credibility on the issue of fighting terrorism.

Frivilous law suit alert!! Jerry and Karen Wessler attended the concert where former Pantera guitarist "Dimebag" Darrell was killed. The couple were not shot at, and were obviously not physically harmed. But they are suing the club owners for failing to provide adequate security, and say they now suffer "severe and permanent emotional injuries." Bitch please! How are these people owed money simply because they were there? Are all witnesses to violent crimes owed money simply because they saw something? Ridiculous.

This is a not a problem for me, thankfully. The Indian Council of Medical Research has just finished a two year study that concluded that international size specifications for condoms are too large for most Indian men. They also found that many men in India were too shy to ask for condoms. The study suggested increasing the number of condom vending machines. As for the size issue...
It turns out that I do have Fox Reality Channel, so I was able to catch the premiere of My Bare Lady. All I can say about the show may be the greatest show ever made! The premise is that four porn stars are given a chance at a "legitimate" acting career by going to London and learning Shakespeare. After a two-week crash course, the girls are then expected to showcase in front of the British theater establishment. They will decide if any of the girls have what it takes to be classical actors.

For the premiere episode, we got the auditions. A ton of porn stars came to the open casting call hoping to get one of the four spots on the show. The girls were interviewed and asked to tell about how they got into porn (that is always amusing). Then they were given some lines from Romeo & Juliet and asked to perform it. Most of the girls had trouble with the old English used in the play (hell I have trouble with that stuff), but they soldiered on anyways. A couple of the girls seemed like they would have had trouble with any English, actually.

By the end of the episode the four winners had been chosen: Nautica Thorn, Kirsten Price, Sasha Knox, and Chanel St James. My personal favorite is Sasha (pictured left). She seemed the most genuine, and she slipped up and said her real name ("Jenna") when she was talking about how much it would mean to her to get this opportunity. I believed her. I'm not sure about the rest of the girls, but I know that Chanel will not make it. The girl seemed dumb as wood. There was a cute girl named Julia Bond that should have made the cut. The casting directors singled her out because she was the only one who memorized the lines for her audition. Oh well, I have already set my TiVo to record every episode of the show.

Saw this at Andrew Sullivan: it is a spoof on the recent PC vs. Mac ad campaign that pits "Christians" vs. "Christ followers." Guess which one represents the religious right!

Slayer has been nominated for its second Grammy Award
. The song "Eyes of the Insane" is nominated for Best Metal Performance. The song comes from Slayer's fantastic Christ Illusion CD.

"Coach" Tom Osborne is no longer a Congressman. Osborne did not run for re-election in 2006, and instead attempted to run for Governor of Nebraska. He was unable to get the nomination of the Republican Party. Osborne served three terms in Congress, and will now be teaching ethics at the University of Nebraska. Wait...a Republican Congressman teaching ethics? No offense to Osborne, but isn't that a little like having John Mark Carr teach a class on child care?

The 7" single (that's a phonograph record for my younger readers) is making a comeback in England! I love singles, and have been so disappointed by the demise of the format in the US. "The resurgence is backed up by figures from the British Phonographic Industry (BPI), a trade group, that show 2005 trade deliveries of 7-inch singles topped 1.87 million units, a 10-year high, accounting for 3.5% of all singles shipments."


Anonymous said...

I like that Mac parody. Very clever.

Dave Splash said...

Quite funny. Sure to ruffle a few right-wing feathers.